{"id":93,"date":"2009-01-30T13:28:15","date_gmt":"2009-01-30T20:28:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/?p=93"},"modified":"2009-01-30T13:28:15","modified_gmt":"2009-01-30T20:28:15","slug":"the-etiquette-of-gift-registries","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/2009\/01\/the-etiquette-of-gift-registries\/","title":{"rendered":"The etiquette of gift registries"},"content":{"rendered":"

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN THE CALGARY HERALD, FEBRUARY 2005, IN LISA HANSLIP’S COLUMN “I DO, BUT DON’T…”<\/span><\/p>\n

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Q: We recently went to register for our wedding and the store clerk offered us registry enclosure cards to include in our invitations. Is this acceptable? We were also a bit unsure what to register for. Help!<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>A: No, no, a thousand times, no! It may seem helpful, but it is never acceptable to enclose a registry notice or gift wish list with your invitation. Never. Ever. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>One of the major etiquette dangers is the method of informing your guests <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>about your registries. The stores themselves help perpetuate this <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>etiquette no-no by offering you the offensive invitation enclosures. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Your gift registry can be one of the most fun aspects of planning your <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>wedding (“Here, honey, just point this gun at things and voila, they’re on <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>our wish list!”) but it can also prove to be an etiquette minefield. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>The first major issue is the registry itself. Today’s engaged couples <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>often have established households of their own, so a registry is an <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>excellent way for your guests to know what you actually need (Oh look! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Another toaster! Everyone needs four toasters, don’t they?). Make sure you <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>think carefully about what you actually need and make a wish list that is <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>agreeable to both you and your partner. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Your guests have different budgets, so register for items in a variety of <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>price ranges. You cannot expect all of your guests to spring for that $400 <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>food processor, or that they will be happy buying you one teaspoon because <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>at $100 a piece it is the only thing on your registry they can afford. A <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>thoughtful gift registry gives everyone the opportunity to buy you <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>something you will love. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>These days, it is also perfectly acceptable to register for nontraditional <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>items such as hardware, sporting goods, charitable donations, or, yes, <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>even the honeymoon. Keep in mind, though, that although lifestyle gifts <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>are appropriate, some people are going to prefer giving you something <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>tangible. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>You may prefer to receive money, which is traditional in many cultures, or <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>contributions to your honeymoon fund, but you cannot tell your guests what <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>to give you. It is just not polite to request gifts of ANY kind. Giving a <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>wedding gift is the socially acceptable thing to do – but no one is really <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>obligated to buy you a gift. Informing your guests what kind of gift you <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>would like at the same time you are inviting them to your wedding is like <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>telling them the gift is more important than their attendance. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>The way to let people know where you’re registered is via word of mouth. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Make sure your bridal party and family know where you are registered or if <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>you have a preference for a more non-traditional gift. Then you have to <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>wait until someone asks where you are registered, and just cross your <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>fingers! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN THE CALGARY HERALD, FEBRUARY 2005, IN LISA HANSLIP’S COLUMN “I DO, BUT DON’T…” Q: We recently went to register for our wedding and the store clerk offered us registry enclosure cards to include in our invitations. Is this acceptable? We were also a bit unsure what to register for. Help! \u00a0 \u00a0A: […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,10,7],"tags":[45,324,43,15,44],"class_list":["post-93","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-etiquette","category-media","category-qa","tag-calgary-herald","tag-etiquette","tag-gift-registry","tag-lisa-hanslip","tag-wedding-planner"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/93","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=93"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/93\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":95,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/93\/revisions\/95"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=93"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=93"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=93"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}