{"id":922,"date":"2012-08-13T15:06:45","date_gmt":"2012-08-13T22:06:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/?p=922"},"modified":"2023-05-18T03:07:41","modified_gmt":"2023-05-18T10:07:41","slug":"whos-paying-for-this-wedding-anyway","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/2012\/08\/whos-paying-for-this-wedding-anyway\/","title":{"rendered":"{ $$ who’s paying for this wedding anyway $$ }"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of our new clients mentioned that they were really stressed about figuring out who is supposed to pay for what at the wedding. This is a question that clients used to ask me ALL the time \u2013 but in the last 5 or 6 years it actually hasn\u2019t come up very often, or only in regards to the rehearsal dinner or one small detail.
\nA good portion of our clients are paying for the wedding themselves so if their parents contribute any money it\u2019s just a nice bonus, but when an engaged couple is counting on their families to pay for most or all of the wedding it can be a sticky topic for a number of reasons.
\n\"wedding-budget-piggybank-main_full\"
\nIt\u2019s rarely the case that both families have similar financial circumstances, and some families wish to stick to a very traditional division of costs where other families don\u2019t have the slightest idea who is supposed to pay for what. All of these elements can conspire to cause the couple a lot of stress \u2013 even just bringing up the subject of the financial obligations can cause even the calmest couple some sleepless nights.
\nTraditionally, of course, the bride\u2019s family assumed the burden of most wedding costs \u2013 probably a vestige of the practice of providing a large dowry to attract a good husband (!!). However, these days only about 25% of weddings are paid for solely by the bride\u2019s parents. Look at the Healing Properties of Herkimer Diamond Quartz Crystals<\/a> and get to know if this is the right stone for you..
\nToday, almost 70% of weddings are paid for either by the couple or by some combination of both sets of parents. It\u2019s now VERY common for both families to share the costs equally, or for the bride and groom to pay for all of the expenses themselves.
\nIf you do want financial help from your families to pay for the wedding, you must keep in mind you must be wiling to compromise on some of your wishes for your wedding. Although it can be a difficult subject to broach this subject with your parents \u2013 do your best to keep the conversation calm & dignified\u2026it\u2019s amazing how grievances that arise during the engagement can linger far past the actual wedding\u2026whatever happens, whoever pays\u2026just remember these people are going to be your family for the rest of your life so tread lightly!
\nIf age-old tradition is ruling the financial structure of your wedding, here is the TRADITIONAL DIVISION OF COSTS from Emily Post\u2019s Wedding Etiquette:
\nThe Bride & Her Family:
\n\u2022 services of a wedding consultant
\n\u2022 invitations, enclosures, announcements
\n\u2022 bride\u2019s wedding gown & accessories
\n\u2022 floral decorations for ceremony & reception
\n\u2022 bridesmaids\u2019 flowers
\n\u2022 bride\u2019s bouquet
\n\u2022 formal wedding photos
\n\u2022 videographer
\n\u2022 music for church & reception
\n\u2022 transportation of bridal party to & from ceremony
\n\u2022 all reception expenses (including the\u00a0marquee hire<\/a>)
\n\u2022 bride\u2019s gifts to her attendants
\n\u2022 bride\u2019s gift to groom
\n\u2022 groom\u2019s wedding ring
\n\u2022 ceremony rentals
\n\u2022 cost of soloists
\n\u2022 transportation of bridal party to reception
\n\u2022 accommodations for bride\u2019s attendants
\n\u2022 bridesmaids\u2019 luncheon<\/p>\n

The Groom & His Family:
\n\u2022 bride\u2019s engagement ring
\n\u2022 bride\u2019s wedding ring
\n\u2022 gifts for groom\u2019s attendants
\n\u2022 ties for groom\u2019s attendants if not part of rental package
\n\u2022 bride\u2019s bouquet (in regions where this is the custom)
\n\u2022 bride\u2019s going-away corsage
\n\u2022 boutonnieres for groom\u2019s attendants
\n\u2022 corsages for immediate members of both families
\n\u2022 officiant\u2019s fee or church donation
\n\u2022 transportation & lodging expenses for the officiant if required & invited to officiate by groom\u2019s family
\n\u2022 marriage license
\n\u2022 transportation for groom and best man to ceremony
\n\u2022 honeymoon
\n\u2022 all costs of rehearsal dinner
\n\u2022 accommodations for groom\u2019s attendants
\n\u2022 bachelor dinner (if groom wishes to have one)
\n\u2022 transportation and lodging for groom\u2019s immediate family*<\/p>\n

Bridesmaids\/Honour Attendants:
\n\u2022 purchase of apparel and all accessories
\n\u2022 transportation to and from city where wedding takes place
\n\u2022 a contribution to a gift from bridesmaids to bride
\n\u2022 individual gift to couple (if being in the wedding is not the gift)
\n\u2022 shower\/luncheon for bride<\/p>\n

Ushers\/Groomsmen\/Best Man:
\n\u2022 rental\/purchase of wedding attire
\n\u2022 transportation to and from city where wedding takes place
\n\u2022 a contribution to a gift from groomsmen to groom
\n\u2022 individual gift to couple (if being in the wedding is not the gift)
\n\u2022 bachelor party for groom<\/p>\n

Out-of-town guests:
\n\u2022 transportation to & from wedding (If you’re considering private jet travel, you can shop around at Jettly<\/a> to find the best deals)
\n\u2022\u00a0wedding gift
\n\u2022\u00a0lodging expenses<\/p>\n

If you’re still looking for the\u00a0ultimate destination wedding venue, then you might want to look into this\u00a0wedding hotel Phu Quoc Vietnam<\/a>.<\/p>\n

* just as a total aside \u2013 it always makes me crazy when I watch \u201cFather of the Bride\u201d and Diane Keaton tells Steve Martin they have to pay for all of the groom\u2019s family to fly in from Denmark\u2026NO!!! No you don\u2019t!! Whether you\u2019re following old traditions or new \u2013 or none for that matter \u2013 unless you happen to own an airlines\u2026that would be just stupid\u2026but artistic license I guess \":)\"<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One of our new clients mentioned that they were really stressed about figuring out who is supposed to pay for what at the wedding. This is a question that clients used to ask me ALL the time \u2013 but in the last 5 or 6 years it actually hasn\u2019t come up very often, or only […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,7],"tags":[27,226,291,47,270,108,290],"class_list":["post-922","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-etiquette","category-qa","tag-calgary-weddings","tag-the-wedding-planner-inc","tag-wedding-budget","tag-wedding-etiquette","tag-wedding-expert","tag-wedding-planning","tag-who-pays-for-what-at-the-wedding"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/922","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=922"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/922\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1050,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/922\/revisions\/1050"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=922"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=922"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=922"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}