{"id":389,"date":"2009-10-11T08:41:32","date_gmt":"2009-10-11T15:41:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/?p=389"},"modified":"2009-10-11T08:42:59","modified_gmt":"2009-10-11T15:42:59","slug":"one-familys-zoo-is-another-familys-small-gathering","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/2009\/10\/one-familys-zoo-is-another-familys-small-gathering\/","title":{"rendered":"One family’s zoo is another family’s small gathering"},"content":{"rendered":"

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN THE CALGARY HERALD, JANUARY 2006, IN LISA HANSLIP\u2019S COLUMN \u201cI DO, BUT DON\u2019T\u2026\u201d
\nThe long road from happy engagement to wedded bliss is paved with potential etiquette faux pas. Wedding planner Lisa Hanslip is here to help you resist your inner Bridezilla along the way.
\n\"wdngszblog\"
\nQ. My fianc\u00e9 and I are planning to get married in about eight months, but we haven\u2019t made many plans yet because we can\u2019t seem to agree on what the wedding should look like. As this is the second marriage for both of us I would like a small intimate event. My fianc\u00e9 on the other hand comes from a very large family and is expecting a large celebration. Do you have any suggestions how we can plan a wedding that will make everyone happy?<\/p>\n

A. A wedding is not just a celebration of the union of two people, but more often than not, it is the joining of two families – which brings with it a veritable treasure trove of opposing traditions and expectations. If the meeting of the in-laws doesn\u2019t tragically mirror a scene from Meet the Fockers consider yourself lucky.<\/p>\n

A good compromise in many situations is to split the difference – but I don\u2019t think a medium-sized ceremony and reception will satisfy either side – you\u2019ll still feel like the event was much bigger than you were hoping for (\u201cThere were 150 people at my wedding, it was a total zoo!\u201d) – and your fianc\u00e9\u2019s family will inevitably deem the moderate guest list too small (\u201cHow can we possibly have a proper wedding celebration with only 150 people?!?\u201d). <\/p>\n

You might consider having a small intimate ceremony with just your immediate family and closest friends followed by a large celebration later in the day. This way you\u2019ll have the memory of a ceremony that reflected your sensibilities while your fianc\u00e9 and his family can relish tales of the big bash.<\/p>\n

Another option is to have the large wedding your fianc\u00e9\u2019s family is hoping for, followed by a small gathering. Try a morning ceremony followed by a raucous afternoon reception – then in the evening you can sit down to an intimate dinner for just immediate family.<\/p>\n

Whatever you decide to do – make sure it is a solution that doesn\u2019t leave either of you disgruntled. Focus on what you two need from your day, even if that means ignoring your families. It doesn\u2019t bode well if one of you spends your wedding night on the sofa (because that only leads to a honeymoon spent on the marriage counselor\u2019s couch – and that\u2019s no good for anybody). <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN THE CALGARY HERALD, JANUARY 2006, IN LISA HANSLIP\u2019S COLUMN \u201cI DO, BUT DON\u2019T\u2026\u201d The long road from happy engagement to wedded bliss is paved with potential etiquette faux pas. Wedding planner Lisa Hanslip is here to help you resist your inner Bridezilla along the way. Q. My fianc\u00e9 and I are planning […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,10,7],"tags":[45,15,133,47,132,131],"class_list":["post-389","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-etiquette","category-media","category-qa","tag-calgary-herald","tag-lisa-hanslip","tag-second-marriage","tag-wedding-etiquette","tag-wedding-guest-list","tag-wedding-planning-calgary"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/389","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=389"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/389\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":392,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/389\/revisions\/392"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=389"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=389"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.askaweddingplanner.com\/blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=389"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}