weddings in alberta

Peacock Paradise

Monday, July 11th, 2011 | media, testimonials, trends, weddings | No Comments

We’re thrilled to be featured again in Weddings in Alberta.
wiab_rw-peacock
The Proposal
Erin and Devlin first met at a party, ten years ago. Seating was tight and they ended up sitting together. They hit it off, but Erin started to feel a bit under the weather. After he helped her to the bathroom throughout the evening, she knew that Devlin was a keeper. After dating for nearly 8 years, during which time Erin had lost her father, the couple knew it was time to tie the knot but a large, extravagant wedding was the last thing on their minds. Deciding to elope, they booked a trip to Vegas, Erin bought a little white dress at the mall, and they started telling people. Those reactions planted a little seed of doubt in the couple’s minds as to whether or not eloping was the right thing to do. After telling her best friend and seeing a mixture of happy and sad in her reaction, Erin and Devlin realized how important it was to have all their family and friends celebrate with them. They didn’t decide until the last minute possible whether they were going to go through with the wedding—but when they came across the perfect engagement ring at a store in Vegas, everything felt right. When they showed the engagement ring to family when they returned, without a matching wedding band, everyone was excited and relieved. And so, the planning for a wedding to take place two and a half years later began.

The Wedding
Drawn towards modern design and technology while sharing a love for classic architecture, Erin and Devlin knew they needed to have a mix of old and new in their wedding style. After selecting the Hotel Arts as their reception space, they found inspiration in the natural, modern elements the venue shows off. Selecting a peacock-inspired colour palette that prominently featured teal, brown, navy blue, and gold allowed some fun and whimsy to be introduced into their big day. With the help of The Wedding Planner, Inc, the wedding was perfectly designed and coordinated. The ceremony took place in an intimate photography studio, incorporating many personal touches. With a small wedding party consisting of just a best man, maid of honour, and bridesmaid, the couple was happy to share their day with the friends that have known them the longest.

The Wedding Planner, Inc. designed a fabulous reception, using copper pintuck linens, teal table runners, and green napkins to tie into the peacock feather colour scheme. Plus, peacock feathers were added throughout the room, resting at each place setting, added into Erin’s bouquet, and even used as the design for a custom gobo on the dance floor. The finishing touches were candelabras placed on each table, an iced martini bar, a four tiered cake decorated with damask-patterned fondant that matched the linens on the head table, and an elaborate candy buffet, complete with custom labels and glassine bags. The couple served food based on their culinary love, choosing appetizers that represented international flavours they had fallen in love with while traveling abroad, and made sure to serve classic Alberta beef tenderloin as a main course. Plans for a dance-filled reception were made to honour Erin’s Pakistani heritage. When they started their planning, the couple knew that her family really wanted to celebrate and all they could hope for was to uphold the family tradition of a memorable wedding—and although they froze up during their first dance and forgot everything they learned in their dance lessons, the party went on!

The Fashion
After she fell in love with a budget-busting dress and making the tough choice not to spend the money on it, Erin kept looking and looking. She lucked out when she found this sample dress from Pronovias at Mina’s Bridal and loved it. The sweetheart neckline gown featured lace appliqués on the bust and hem, and was perfect for her trash-the-dress session with f8 Photography in the hotel pool to morning after the wedding. She added bright blue heels, a birdcage veil, and a colourful bouquet with a small silver picture frame attached, holding a photo of her father who passed away a few years ago.

http://weddingsinalberta.com/realweddings.php?articleId=689&image=14

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fight fair

Monday, March 14th, 2011 | Q&A, Uncategorized | No Comments

bride-and-groom-fighting

You can live in a fantasy world, where you think you will never disagree. Why? Because “We just love each other so much.” Well, guess what? That is just not reality. The only way a marriage will never have confrontation is if your spouse always gives in and never challenges anything you do. If this is you, prepare yourself: this is a sign of a very unhealthy marriage.

Since disagreement and confrontations will inevitably come up in your marriage, a great idea is to set some guidelines that will help you through those times and come out as a stronger couple and partnership.

The way you approach a disagreement will largely depend on 2 things:

The Way You Were Raised
When I was younger, I thought all issues in the world were resolved the way my dad confronted them. We would sit down and unemotionally go over whatever the problem was until it was resolved. This method was quite foreign to my wife’s family experience. If I saw something in Carol that I thought was important to confront, it was best for me to package it into a short and concise statement, and then leave it with her. Trying to talk it through on the spot (like I would have with my father) only made the matters worse. We both came to realize very early in our marriage that neither of our family experiences was going to be the model that worked for us.

How was your family experience different from your partner’s? Did you come from a broken home where issues didn’t get resolved? No matter how you were brought up, you can find something that works for your marriage. It is never fun to be confronted, but since it is going to happen, ask your partner the method they would most prefer.

Your Personality Type
There are some people that love to confront and others that try to avoid it. If you are a confronter, pause for a moment and ask yourself if the issue is worth raising. What is your motivation? Is your purpose to help your spouse become a better person, or do you just want them to change to be more like you? 

On the other hand, if you’re avoiding confrontation, is that simply because you’re afraid of it? Would your relationship stand on healthier ground if you were to discuss the issue? If you avoid confrontation, you are not doing your marriage any favours. Your spouse will often never know what bothers you unless you tell him or her. By just stewing about something instead of dealing with it, the problem only grows. 

Timing is everything.
Here are a few ideas to help you pick the right time:

Don’t start talking about a contentious issue as you are going out. You will ruin your evening if you don’t have enough time to resolve things, and you’ll dwell on the issue the entire time.

Don’t let a problem be the first thing you raise after getting together after work. Let those first moments be kept for showing each other how excited you are see each other.

Never pick a time when there are others around. It will be awkward for them and embarrassing for your spouse. 

If you are not ready to deal with something, tell your spouse that you would like to give it a bit of time to think. If you are going to push it off for a while, tell your partner how much time you need. You can’t avoid issues forever and expect a happy marriage.

One last thing: Never attack the person.

There are words to avoid, which if used, will prolong your agony and leave battle scars. Avoid phrases like, “You always” and “You never.” They are rarely true and will provide something else to argue about.

Avoid words that attack the person and not the problem. By saying, “You are a slob,” you’re attacking the person, but by saying “Your actions are messy,” you address the problem. Similarly,  “You’re such a crab” attacks the person, but “You seem to be complaining a lot,” addresses the problem.

If you are prone to getting angry, practise talking slower and at a lower pitch. The goal is not to out-shout your spouse, but to help him or her see things from another perspective, or find some middle ground that you can both live with.

When a resolution is found, apologies may be needed (depending on what has transpired) before you can move on. I heard a story of a husband coming to his wife saying,“I’m sorry.” Her response came with a wagging of her finger: “I’ve seen sorry, and this isn’t it.” Make sure your apology is sincere and heart-felt. If you have wronged your spouse, an “I’m sorry” doesn’t always cut it. You will need to use the words, “Will you forgive me?” It is humbling to say this, but necessary to put it behind you.

After all is said and apologies are made, let the fun part begin. Disagreements are so much easier to take if you know that making up will follow. Since disagreements will come, and maybe some heated verbal exchanges as well, take comfort that you are not alone and working through these issues will only make your marriage stronger.

 

Source: Parrott, Less III and Leslie Parrott. “Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts: Seven Questions to Ask Before (and After) You Marry.” Zondervan, 1995.

http://www.weddingsinalberta.com/articles.php?articleId=539

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ask the expert

Wednesday, January 5th, 2011 | etiquette, media, Q&A | No Comments

wia_ask_expert

Weddings in Alberta is launching its first issue this month.

http://weddingsinalberta.com/articles.php?articleId=429

We’re excited to see everything in print. It is monthly so it should be very popular with the brides!

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